The other night I was on an instant message with a friend from a different part of the country that I live in. We are close to the same age, both looking for someone, and both a lot on the shy side. During the conversation we decided we needed to take more risks. We decided we need to get out there and make ouselves seen. I'm am so proud of her for what she did the next day.
She went out to breaksfast at a restaurant alone. A big step for anyone really but even more so for a woman. She saw some guys but they were all married or otherwise taken. But the important thing is that she took a risk. Good for her.
As part of taking a risk she challenged me to take a risk. To go to a grocery store and if I found an available woman to at least say hi to her. OK, she can do something big like go to a restaurant alone, I can do something big like go to a grocery store and smile and speak to someone. I walked over to the grocery store in my neighborhood not once but three times. Unfortunately, every time I walked through the grocery store all the ladies had wedding rings on or were with someone so I couldn't complete the mission. But the important thing isn't that I didn't complete the mission, the important thing is that I took a risk, and was ready to complete the mission if the situation presented itself. Good for me.
After my excursions to the grocery store I went to the golf course and explored taking golfing lessons. Monday I am going to the driving range just to see how far I've regressed since stopping playing golf a few years back and to see how much instruction I need. A beginning class or an advanced class.
I appreciate my friend that I instant messaged with becuase she has encouraged me to take risks. Friends like that are rare.
What risks are you taking today?
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8 comments:
Good for your friend and good for you. Having a support system is so darned important when we're trying to make changes. The trips to the grocery store sound good. Will you continue that mission? And good job on checking out the golf. Physical exercise AND a chance to meet new people. After all, sometimes guys are the ones who can point you to the girls, no?
Hi Dr
Hope things are better with you.
Yes, I am going to make daily trips to the grocery store. It is within walking distance from my house so is an easy deal. Most my men friends are married so are not a good source of meeting women. Most of the golf lessons will be men. However, it will get me in even better shape so I can compete better with other men.
Bill
Good for you Bill! I have been taking risks by trying to talk to people in the languages I have all but forgotten! (I love being the butt of jokes in conversations!) You have to have very thick skin to try to speak a different language.
Hi Lisa!!
So you have been traveling to foreign countries again?
That is a risk in itself.
Bill
Good for you and for your friend, too. Baby steps in risk-taking. Offhand, though, I'd think that for meeting new (opposite sex) people, neither breakfast nor the market would be very productive. I'd look for groups where you can ease into knowing people -- maybe a golf group when you're comfy with the game. Maybe a dining group -- our local adult school offers a course in "ethnic dining" that looks interesting. And those groups are usually women-heavy, so would be good for you. Take an evening course in cooking or crafting, and tell your friend to sign up for basic auto mechanics or something attractive to the male of the species. You might check out a senior center. There are plenty of dodderers, but quite a few 50ish active people, too, depending on what you sign up for (and what age group you're looking for).
Just a few thoughts...
Hi Pat
Thank you for your thoughts and I love all your ideas. I actually hope to try some of them.
You really do have some great ideas!
Bill
Interesting concept! Myself, if I go to the store I'm so busy looking for what I want I don't even notice others around me. I really dislike going inside a place to eat alone : ( Kudos for you for trying it, Bill!!
Hi Symply
I don't really mind going to a restaurant and eating alone but then I'm a guy and it is easier for me.
Now the grocery store I could get used to hanging out there.
Bill
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