The job starts tomorrow and as an excessive worrier I have several concerns about it. They do things completely different than anything I am used to and I’m a little fearful that I might not be able to learn it as well as I would like to. It will also be the first time in a number of years that someone will be reviewing my work. I hope that I can react to that appropriately and learn from it rather than let my ego get damaged. Then there is the concern about Mom. How is she going to react now that I won’t be able to spend as much time with her as I have in the past? The next couple of months could be really trying for her. She is aware of it and says she will do fine. My plans right now are to take Mom out for dinner on Tuesday nights and lunches on Saturday and Sunday. Also sister and brother-in-law are coming February 17 for a week to ten days and for that period of time the worry will subside. I also wonder if I will be to busy the next couple of months with the blog, the job, mom, working with the guys that bought my business, my writing and if I fit it in the comedy class. I do know the next couple of months will go fast. My plans now are to bite the bullet do my best for the next couple of months and when the busy time ends start an extreme plan to find the one with profiles up and down the West Coast and on a couple of dating sites and maybe even a plea on my blog! I want 2009 itto be an exciting year!
On to the next subject, movies! Went to FROST/NIXON on Friday. I really, really enjoyed . For you young ones that don’t remember the incident. David Frost was an obscure British TV host. President Richard Nixon resigned and went to his retreat in San Clemente, California to avoid the public eye. Frost came up with the idea to interview President Nixon. Everyone discouraged Frost from going for the interview because he wasn’t a journalist but rather a talk show host. Not being able to get a lot of his own funding Frost invested millions of his own money in the interview. President Nixon wanted to come back in to the public eye to redeem himself. It was a match made in heaven. The movie really is three parts; Frost trying to find funding and a place to air the interview, the relationship that develops between Frost and Nixon, and the actual interview. It is a nice piece of history that some Republican talking heads alive during that time have said is “ ninety-percent accurate”. The movie, one of the five nominees for an Oscar for best picture, is directed by Ron Howard and scripted by Peter Morgan. It is fast moving and very deserving of your time. Frank Langella was nominated for best actor for his characterization of Richard Nixon. It was an Oscar deserving performance but Michael Sheen as David Frost should have also been nominated for an Oscar. His role has been undervalued from the beginning of award season. Kevin Bacon also gave a worthy performance as Nixon assistant, Jack Brennan but his part fell just short of being Oscar worthy. One football for direction, One Football for Langella, One football for Sheen, One Football for the scenery that captured the time that the movie took place, and one football for the best scene in the movie when Nixon calls Frost before the last segment of the interview.
For you non-football fans, I’m sorry but I cannot not mention the Super Bowl on Super Bowl Sunday. Arizona 19 Pittsburgh 17! Sometime in the next couple of days I may report on the commercials we see during this year‘s super bowl! Heck I may even mention how I feel about that ugly non Super Bowl Commercial, you know the on that tells you to call the doctor if you have something for four hours.
Just some summaries of Update Day and things that I know are going on with the bloggers. Mary Z, I hope your Jesse is home and enjoying some peace. Pat, I hope the transition of your mom out of Hospice is going as well as can be expected. DR, I hope that Deb will soon be on her way and that you will be able to attend the Hamfest right on time. Red, hope things are well with you. Lisa, I bet you are happy being home after what seemed like a long trip. Kim, I hope everyone is resting after your daughter’s birthday. Mary, my best for a good tax season for you! Dona, I’ve been rooting for a long time that things are getting better for your dad. Snug, good luck with your parents and may your dad keep on improving well enough to keep visiting! Sian I hope the kitty comes home. Kaye may the new caregiver for your mom work out for you! Symply, hope the job, school, and daughter are all well! And last but not least Bev, I hope the puppy is comfortable enough in the new home that he stays there forever and I hope you eyesight is improving after your surgery! If I’ve forgot someone please forgive my, I haven’t had my coffee yet!
Any advise for me on my concerns about starting the job? May Super Bowl Sunday be a Super Day for you!
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18 comments:
Bill, finding the right one is like chasing a butterfly. If you run after it all it does is run away from you. If you sit still long enough it will find you. If you continue to pour yourself into life, by doing all the things you love to do, it will happen for you if you truly want that. Until you do for you, it will elude you. Good luck.
Hi Red
That is a very eloquent description of dating.
However, I've been sitting home to long waiting for it to happen. Nobody knows I'm alive if I don't take a risk and put myself out there!
Bill
Bill you missed my point. I didn't say sit at home. I said engage yourself in life - do all the things that bring you joy and you are passionate about - get out in the world and you will find that perfect someone. Sitting at home wasn't what I was suggesting. Yes, you need to put yourself out there - but do the things you love to do. Many years ago I read an article where a gal was looking for that perfect someone and she sat at home. A counselor asked her what she liked to do - well she liked to hike, photography, dance, etc. The counselor told her to get out in the world and do those things - which she did and she found her soulmate on a hiking trip! That was my point - not sitting at home but do the things you love and that will attract someone to you who loves to do those same things.
Hi Red
Sorry I missed your point.
That is one reason I took a comedy class last year, to meet people with common interests. I enjoy humor. Met some really nice folks. After this busy time I plan to travel, take more classes (acting, comedy, cooking) but I also plan to put myself on sites and try to push myself to the edge.
I'm also going to go to more single events. Up until a couple of years ago the only place I met people was when I did their taxes and ethically couldn't pursue clients!
I loved reading both your messages. Your advise is right on!
Bill
Thanks for the nice words, Bill. Tax season. Bah. I need to find another line of work. I got yelled at yesterday by a client because I couldn't tell her when (or if) she'd be getting a stimulus check this summer. I told her the plan that Congress is looking at right now involves jobs, not checks. That don't help me any! she said. I'm not gonna go out and get training for a new job! I just want a check!
Some of my clients give new meaning to the word entitlement, this time of year.
Good luck tomorrow! It's not so bad having someone double check your work. I actually like it when someone looks over what I do. Sometimes I learn new things. I'll be anxious to hear how it goes!
Hi Mary
So now you have to predict what Congress is going to do besides doing tax returns? The current proposal won't be anything like the final one.
I hope you clients get more realistic as tax season goes on!
The important thing is that tax returns are right before they go out of the office. If I can keep repeating that I woun't mind people checking my work!
Bill
I'll go with Redwhistle's advice about doing the stuff you really enjoy and hoping to find the right person who enjoys those things, too. My daughter met her husband in an astronomy group, and they still get their telescopes out quite often, plus they are both computer geeks and both love hiking, photography, and flying model airplanes.
As to the job, I wouldn't worry if I were you. You know your field, and you are super-conscientious. They couldn't hope for a better person to work with, imo.
My mom's transition from hospice seems to be going okay. I think I've found the right doctor, who will even do housecalls, what a miracle that is! Now if I can get the insurance settled, we'll be well on the road.
Hi Pat
I'm glad your Mom's transition is going well and that your found a doctor that will make house calls. I will send out all sorts of good vibes that you get the insurance all worked out.
Neat story about your daughter and husband. A good example to follow.
Thank you for the nice comment about me conscientious!
Bill
Thanks Pat! I had been a member of singles groups myself and never met anyone. I know lots of friends who joined singles groups and never met anyone either. One of my friends recently gave up going to those as well after I told her they don't always work. She started going to Blazer games because she absolutely loves basketball. She met someone there and has been going with him now for almost two years. I can tell you many stories like that.
I still believe when you force it or try to make something work, or think it has to work, it doesn't necessary do so. I've learned that in my career as well. However, having said that I also know two people who met their spouses on those match sites - so I guess that works as well.
All in all, I believe when you are ready, when you are whole within yourself, when you really don't care deep down if it happens today or tomorrow or next year, but are out enjoying life and enjoying all the things you like to do, then it will happen. When I wasn't looking, that's when I always found someone.
Hi Red
I agree with single groups don't really work unless they are targeted interests group. And I'm not sold on online dating for a number of reasons. The two you know that met on a match site are more the exception that the rule. However, I do think the more things you do and the more people you meet you have a better chance of connecting with someone.
And to agree with another point of yours. I've really never been ready to meet someone until now. The timing just wasn't right. I do think, however, I missed out on some opportunities with people I had a lot in common with because I wasn't ready nor willing to take the risks required for a relationship.
I pretty much agree with all of your points and I don't plan on forcing things with anyone. I just plan on meeting a lot of people and whatever happens, happens.
That's great Bill. I wish you luck and I was going to include something about not being ready or the timing may not be right but you knew that yourself. There have been times when I wasn't ready nor did I want to meet anyone and actually sometimes it happened during those times as well. It will happen for you with that attitude. Enjoy life and do all the things you love to do and it will happen. Life has a way of figuring it for you and if you don't dwell on it, it will come your way.
Dr, Stephan Covey's book has an example of your life being boxes. If you fill up the boxes, or all the areas in your life, things happen. In other words, fill your social box up, fill your friendship box up, fill your religious box up, fill your work box up, etc. Too many of us don't fill up all our boxes --- all the segments in our lives -- so it just doesn't happen and we aren't happy. Happiness attracts and you will find someone. Enjoy! I won't lecture any more, I promise.
Red!
Not one thing that you have said or done have I considered as lecturing. Just the opposite. I found it to be a very interesting conversation. I'm extremely glad that we are having it. It is nice to get your insights on things. Please don't feel like you have to stop conversing for fear of upsetting me, I'm learning a lot.
Like I didn't know the author Stephen Covey until now. His example of boxes is extremely interesting. And I've written on several posts about how negative people bring positive people down and staying positive atrracts positve people!
So instead of apologizing for lecturing me accept my thank you for having this conversation!
Bill
I understand the concerns about the new job, as it's different from what you've done before. However, as Pat said (and as I know from experience) you're extremely concientious and very good at what you do, primarily because you work in your client's best interests and are patient as a saint! Having someone review yourwork, after all your years in business, would be a bit unsettling to any one of us, I suspect, but I also feel sure you've nothing to worry about there.
I hear you on worries about your mom and am glad to hear Sis will be there for week or so to give you a break. I think the hardest part of the past few years has been trying to find a "good" balance between Mom, work and Himself and home. It's a constant juggling act and I'm still looking for a workable formula. Trying to fit it all into a 24 hour day sometimes seems impossible, yet what do you give up, if you're going to remain well enough yourself -- physically, mentally and emotionally -- to do what needs doing for others?
To answer your one question, I still don't have a departure/arrival date for Deb, but in my MomReport did mention we were looking forward to her visit and that HImself and I planned to leave town on the 11th, latest. Mom knows, as of our conversation last night (when she said Deb was again delaying departure) that I won't leave town if Deb's not here, so maybe she can light a fire (g).
I have to agree wtih everything Red said about timing and people and you can't "make it happen" but can put yourself in positions where it will happen. As an example... I was still single at 35 much to the despair of my family and extended family. A girlfriend and I were disucssing the fact and both admitted that we had basically satisfying lives, except for an SO, and were willing to go through life single. Within a month, I met the man I married six months later and she was married two months after I was. When Walt died, three and a half years after we were married, I planned a single life, sell the house and was set to buy an RV and become a nomad. A year later I was married to a man who'd been a friend of ours for several years, but whom I'd never have considered as a husband, given our lifestyles. It seems that when you stop looking and start living in all areas (the boxes Covey refers to) you may meet someone. I think it has to do with being comfortable in your own skin, so to speak, pursuing your real interests and being satisfied with your own life. At that point, it's not that you *need* someone to complete your life, but that you're ready to have someone share it, if that makes any sense. And that seems to attract others. At the risk of sounding facetous (sp?), it'w when I quit looking, decided I was happy being single, that I stumbled across two of the most wonderful men I've ever met, two total opposites, btw. I spent almost twenty years actually looking for the man who would make my life complete. When I made my life complete on my own and quit looking, there they were. Go figure. Oh, also btw, my family and some friends were semi-appalled at both choices and knew neither would work out. Granted, Walt and I had major issues with our ex-wife and his girls, but they didn't prevent a happy marriage. And, since Himself and I celebrated our 22nd anniversary last November, I guess they were wrong on that count as well (g).
Thank you Bill. And, thank you Lady DR and I agree with everything you said as well.
I just came back from seeing Gran Torino. I was prepared not to like the movie nor did I expect anything. But WOW what a powerful and great movie. I really enjoyed it (although I don't know if I would use the word enjoy considering some parts of the movie). It was great. I understand it will be Clint Eastwood's last movie - but I am sure time will tell.
Anyways, things always work out in the long run whether you believe they will or not.
Hi Dr
Thank you so much for saying that I have my clients' interest at heart and am patient. Yours and
Pat's words have really lessened a lot of the fears that I have!
Mom, the caregiver, and I had a Super Bowl party at my house. I fixed a bunch of snacks, some little sandwiches, etc. It was a great day for everyone. A really positive experience before starting the job tomorrow. The game was great to, just the wrong team won.
Finding a balance when you have elderly parents is a constant concern and juggling act. Finding a workable formula is like eating jello with a fork.
If I were you I'd leave on the 11th no matter what and have a local church check on your mom daily if Deb doesn't make it.
Red's messages were interesting and I'm glad she posted them. And you understood what I said about putting myself out there, not forcing anything to happen but putting myself in a position for it to happen.
I love your story of how you met our husband. I also love the example of the boxes. Gosh this converstion turned out really ineresting and informative. However, I think two men found one of the most perfect women I know as a wife!
As for my family, they are so anxious for me to get married they would accept anyone I chose!
Bill
Hi Red
I also had trouble with some of the scenes in Gran Torino. But since it was Clint Eastwood's last appearance in a movie, I thought he should have nominated for a best actor Oscar and the gal that played the teen neighbor should have been nominated for best supporting actress.
I know things will work out in the long run.
Again thanks for the conversation. I want you to always feel comfortable here on the blog and to always feel free to say anything on your mind.
We have a wonderful group here that is used to having good conversations with opposing views.
Bill
Wow, quite a compliment, Bill. Thank you.
Be patient and observing and let things happen. I didn't consider either Walt or Al as potential husband material, which goes to show what I knew!
Yeah, bummer on the SB game, but it was a really good game to watch. AZ lost it on penalities, I think, but they're a new team and I think they may have been over eager. Then again, since I watch an daverage of one football game a year, what do I know?
Hi Dr
The compliment was well deserved!
And you advise about being observant is right on, that is one of my main downfalls, not paying attention when someone shows interest in me
Bill
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