Walking The Mall

The last two days I had breakfast meetings so I didn't get my early walk in, however, both meetings were near a mall so I walked the mall after breakfast. One of the malls was Washington Square in Tigard, the other was Clackamas Town Center in Clackamas.

The last two days I learned a lot about mall walking and thought I would share some of that knowledge today.

Women that walk the mall range in age from 18 to 94. Yes 94. I stopped and talked to the lady and she told me her age. Sure she was using a walker, sure she was walking a bit slow but bless her heart she was out there trying and not sitting at home looking out the window.

Men that walk the mall range in age from 150 to 200. Seriously probably in the mid-70s. I was the youngest man walking the mall by at least twenty years.

Each mall has the same type of people, so much so that you may even forget what mall you are in:

The greeter. Usually a man. Says hi and nice to see you to every living soul at the mall. Introduces himself to every new person there.

Then there is the speed demon. Walks faster than someone running the three minute mile. He barely lasts a lap. Then it is coffee and a sausage biscuit at McDonalds.

The nonconformist. Walks exactly the opposite direction that everyone else is walking.

Finally, there is the senior social club. About twenty people sitting around tables at either McDonalds or Starbucks. As soon as the walk is over they come together to talk over the politics of the day, their aches and pains, relatives, and sports. It is amazing what a man can learn if you sit outside the group and listen.

I also learned there are some dangers in walking the mall. The dangers fall into one of three catergories; mild, serious, or extreme danger.

The mild danger is only if you are the youngest man walking the mall and if sometimes when you walk one of your shoelaces works it way untied. With so many woman that are mom's it is a real danger that one of them will drop down and tie your shoe for you. I kind of went with the flow and thanked her. I might have been upset if she had asked me when my daily feeding was.

The serious danger comes from the new moms's stroller club. About twenty of them meet at each mall and try to work back in shape. However, if you are walking the mall at the same time they are watch out for the new moms and their strollers. If you see them coming get out of the way fast otherwise the first one will knock you over and the last one will reach down to test you pulse to make sure they didn't kill you. Then you can get up, brush yourself off, and continue your walk.

The extreme danger is the Cinnabon at the end of the walk. Fighting temptation has never been my strong suit.

That is for the day may peace and prosperity be with you all.